bittersweet symphony

Mr. Bean/Princess Pea/Charlie Girl:

The weeks leading up to today, your first birthday, I had delusional visions  of penning the perfect praise of the initial 365 days of your lives. It wasn't until I sat down to do so that I realized I struggle to conceptualize the appropriate thoughts, words and feelings that are free-flowing through my brain yet seem damn near impossible to transmit to print. I assure you it isn't for lack of content, but rather, for once in my life, I am at a loss for words.

As I reflect on our unequivocal union, there aren't vocable expressions deemed appropriate to describe the changes, challenges and chaos that has ensued as a result of your birth and homecoming. On the flip side, I am overwhelmed with feelings of joy and happiness upon seeing your faces light up when I enter the room. The sounds you emit when I exit are nowhere near as joyous, however, they're always taken with a grain of salt. After all, you are babies.

I'm sure this goes without saying but this last year has, undoubtedly, been the most bittersweet twelve-month period of my life. Sacrificing a career that I loved to become a stay-at-home mom was never a conceivable notion in my life plan, however, the sense of pride and accomplishment that I now endure on a daily basis is immeasurable. Having four children in two-and-half years is not for the faint-hearted, and caring for you all has been no easy feat. My once short-term daily goals of making it through each 24 hours have now turned into an award-worthy, year-long achievement. 

To make up for the fact that I wasn't able to hold you on the day you were born, I couldn't pass up the opportunity to do so today. Happy First Birthday, my sweet litter. You'll forever be my bittersweet symphony. 

All my love, 

Mumma